My heart 💜 goes out to you. It is definitely difficult when you lose your dad 💯. Grief will ebb and flow. Doesn’t follow a pattern and often resurfaces. Talking helps. I don’t know exactly what you are dealing with in your life, but you seem to be engaging with yourself and others to cope with the pain.
Reminders
Be kind and patient with yourself. You will find you are your rock and you will find others to build on that rock to strengthen, grow, and share with you.
Take time to appreciate the little things. The sunshine or shade. A breeze whispering through leaves on a tree. Birds singing. Walk your neighborhood. Relish a favorite meal. Cherish your family and friends.
You know these things. You will find your way, but ask and accept help. Your post was real. It showed your strength, your courage, your vulnerability, and your heart.♥️ q
Ryan... at 71 I hear you and so agree but I can tell u today's climate is the most difficult I have ever gone thru but I will tell u after nursing for over 30 yrs it filled a void. Today if this helps..... u will feel better when u help someone else. Your feelings are valid but reach your hand out whether its a person that needs help, a foster pup or cat.... when u give to something else it becomes easier until u find the thing that gives u joy. And grieve with yr mom....
That's very true, Gayle. And thank you for sharing this. I've been thinking about getting into teaching or coaching, as that's what I feel most called to do . . . Not sure I'll do it immediately, but I do think that'll be a step for me eventually!
Ryan.. you are not alone. Think of the kids that need coaches that understand what they are going thru and everyone is confused at some time. You are the kind of coach they need.. or BIG BROTHER. Its just hard but my best days are when they end with I did something however small to understand. Today I simply handed a cold water bottle to man in median. Prob needed money.. didn't have any but he thanked me saying the water was what he needed. Try and have good day, Ryan. Thinking of you..... gayle
I feel you bro! Honestly sometimes it’s a rough patch. What’s helped me when it gets hard is to say to myself, —this is what hard feels like. Sometimes that kind of levels it for me. It’s an acceptance that allows me to smile through the pain, and it eases the load a bit. Regardless, it’s so cool to see you documenting this because when you’re on top watching this video back will feel bittersweet
Yes 100%. In a way, it is kind of cool because you can see, if you look at it a certain way, that you're right there in the midst of the struggle. Doesn't make it any less painful, but it does help you keep going!
Ryan, yes, it’s hard — on all of us. I’m an old woman. Here’s what I do — shut the noise out. Focus on what you CAN do today only. This is like climbing a rock face, not a simple action of “right will heal all”. If you have to, drop back and catch your breath. Make a list of fear vs. action. For every fear, add an action (no matter how small) that is positive. You may have only one pair by the end of the day, but the action will carry through and grow with practice.
Or …you can keep telling the truth and light a match to the lies and gear up for a battle. You feel it. Your soul acknowledges its presence. You are going to have to fight. … No generation before you wanted to either. Use your voice to fight the good fight online remotely. Your finances will settle…. But what’s happening in the US needs your generations voice.
Ryan, in the end, where you live or how you choose to earn a living doesn't matter that much. What matters more is embracing each moment, good, bad, easy, and hard, and letting your future unfold like the pages of a story. Make tomorrow's memory of today the best it can be. You're inspiring, thoughtful, and genuine, and I am grateful to have you in my life. And, I'm looking forward to having one of your fabulous creations for dinner on Thursday! Love, Mom
I’m 66 years old Ryan, I have had struggles in my life that I couldn’t exactly articulate, so you’re fine. If you’d like a different perspective please reach out and DM me, I would try to help you out.
Ryan I’m listening to your experience with a therapist’s filter.
I hear a similar existential angst from your peers in my work.
Therapy would offer an opportunity to share your life’s experiences and build on your strengths, as your voice would be heard and powerfully acknowledged.
Bravo to you for having the courage to speak out so personally.
It’s important that you are anticipating positive change in the fall.
In the mean time, know that the answers we seek are within us.
The more that we pay attention to our inner voice it becomes clearer and provides the strength to continue to pay attention to our inner power.
Very true, and thank you so much for this reflection, Sarah! I've thought about becoming a therapist before, but I turned away from that path to pursue the written word. I do think, however, that there are subtle but incredible overlaps in the industries. As for community, though, I think I'd have to get into teaching!
Extreme situations, which we are definitely in, sometimes call for words that a person doesn’t normally use or uses infrequently. If people can’t understand that then they need to. You obviously feel very deeply about what you were going to communicate. Otherwise the emotion would not leak out. Do what you think is best, but don’t censor yourself out of fear. That is what the Don and his followers are banking on.
Hi Ryan, thank you for your posts. It is encouraging to hear from a person who cares deeply about what is going on. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself. This stuff is stressful. This post (ignore the sensationalist headline) describes ways we can regularly help our minds and bodies cope with all the stress. Be strong.
You did well in unearthing uncertainty...it hits us all at some point...especially when we choose to live authentically...with awareness Socrates was right...the unexamined life is not worth living.
I understand being "dutiful" out of the last 20 years, 18I have been spent as a caregiver...
Keep questioning...the answers will appear...you're on the right path Ryan
Older than you, I feel you, brother. You know more than you think, and your video was a step, one more foot in front of the other. Keep on keepin’ on, you're not alone. ☮️
1) A nature walk will do enormous good
2) work out (without overdoing it)
3) manage your emotions, meaning some thoughts you can change immediately and others, as you wisely note, you just ride the storm out
4) Get more interested in others. Talk to your mother, does she need help?
5) Sorry to hear of your Father's passing. Engage in conversation with an older man, not to replace your Dad, of course, but to gain wisdom.
Thank you Ben! Will definitely take these ideas into account.
My heart 💜 goes out to you. It is definitely difficult when you lose your dad 💯. Grief will ebb and flow. Doesn’t follow a pattern and often resurfaces. Talking helps. I don’t know exactly what you are dealing with in your life, but you seem to be engaging with yourself and others to cope with the pain.
Reminders
Be kind and patient with yourself. You will find you are your rock and you will find others to build on that rock to strengthen, grow, and share with you.
Take time to appreciate the little things. The sunshine or shade. A breeze whispering through leaves on a tree. Birds singing. Walk your neighborhood. Relish a favorite meal. Cherish your family and friends.
You know these things. You will find your way, but ask and accept help. Your post was real. It showed your strength, your courage, your vulnerability, and your heart.♥️ q
Thanks for being so honest and open.
Wow, I really appreciate this response Victoria. Thank you for the words of encouragement, I'm glad you liked the post!
Ryan... at 71 I hear you and so agree but I can tell u today's climate is the most difficult I have ever gone thru but I will tell u after nursing for over 30 yrs it filled a void. Today if this helps..... u will feel better when u help someone else. Your feelings are valid but reach your hand out whether its a person that needs help, a foster pup or cat.... when u give to something else it becomes easier until u find the thing that gives u joy. And grieve with yr mom....
That's very true, Gayle. And thank you for sharing this. I've been thinking about getting into teaching or coaching, as that's what I feel most called to do . . . Not sure I'll do it immediately, but I do think that'll be a step for me eventually!
Ryan.. you are not alone. Think of the kids that need coaches that understand what they are going thru and everyone is confused at some time. You are the kind of coach they need.. or BIG BROTHER. Its just hard but my best days are when they end with I did something however small to understand. Today I simply handed a cold water bottle to man in median. Prob needed money.. didn't have any but he thanked me saying the water was what he needed. Try and have good day, Ryan. Thinking of you..... gayle
Very true, you make a good point. Thank you so much!
Just speak out and don’t worry. You will do fine.
Thank you!
I feel you bro! Honestly sometimes it’s a rough patch. What’s helped me when it gets hard is to say to myself, —this is what hard feels like. Sometimes that kind of levels it for me. It’s an acceptance that allows me to smile through the pain, and it eases the load a bit. Regardless, it’s so cool to see you documenting this because when you’re on top watching this video back will feel bittersweet
Yes 100%. In a way, it is kind of cool because you can see, if you look at it a certain way, that you're right there in the midst of the struggle. Doesn't make it any less painful, but it does help you keep going!
Ryan, yes, it’s hard — on all of us. I’m an old woman. Here’s what I do — shut the noise out. Focus on what you CAN do today only. This is like climbing a rock face, not a simple action of “right will heal all”. If you have to, drop back and catch your breath. Make a list of fear vs. action. For every fear, add an action (no matter how small) that is positive. You may have only one pair by the end of the day, but the action will carry through and grow with practice.
Thank you Patricia, I appreciate this insight!
Or …you can keep telling the truth and light a match to the lies and gear up for a battle. You feel it. Your soul acknowledges its presence. You are going to have to fight. … No generation before you wanted to either. Use your voice to fight the good fight online remotely. Your finances will settle…. But what’s happening in the US needs your generations voice.
Very true, thank you for the encouragement!
Ryan, in the end, where you live or how you choose to earn a living doesn't matter that much. What matters more is embracing each moment, good, bad, easy, and hard, and letting your future unfold like the pages of a story. Make tomorrow's memory of today the best it can be. You're inspiring, thoughtful, and genuine, and I am grateful to have you in my life. And, I'm looking forward to having one of your fabulous creations for dinner on Thursday! Love, Mom
Thanks Mom, love you too
I’m 66 years old Ryan, I have had struggles in my life that I couldn’t exactly articulate, so you’re fine. If you’d like a different perspective please reach out and DM me, I would try to help you out.
Thank you Anne, I appreciate that!
Ryan I’m listening to your experience with a therapist’s filter.
I hear a similar existential angst from your peers in my work.
Therapy would offer an opportunity to share your life’s experiences and build on your strengths, as your voice would be heard and powerfully acknowledged.
Bravo to you for having the courage to speak out so personally.
It’s important that you are anticipating positive change in the fall.
In the mean time, know that the answers we seek are within us.
The more that we pay attention to our inner voice it becomes clearer and provides the strength to continue to pay attention to our inner power.
Very true, and thank you so much for this reflection, Sarah! I've thought about becoming a therapist before, but I turned away from that path to pursue the written word. I do think, however, that there are subtle but incredible overlaps in the industries. As for community, though, I think I'd have to get into teaching!
Extreme situations, which we are definitely in, sometimes call for words that a person doesn’t normally use or uses infrequently. If people can’t understand that then they need to. You obviously feel very deeply about what you were going to communicate. Otherwise the emotion would not leak out. Do what you think is best, but don’t censor yourself out of fear. That is what the Don and his followers are banking on.
Thank you Leah!
Hi Ryan, thank you for your posts. It is encouraging to hear from a person who cares deeply about what is going on. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself. This stuff is stressful. This post (ignore the sensationalist headline) describes ways we can regularly help our minds and bodies cope with all the stress. Be strong.
https://open.substack.com/pub/drlauriemarbas/p/the-shocking-science-of-how-tiny?r=26c38g&utm_medium=ios
Thank you very much, I really appreciate your words!
You are spot on
Thank you Kris!
You did well in unearthing uncertainty...it hits us all at some point...especially when we choose to live authentically...with awareness Socrates was right...the unexamined life is not worth living.
I understand being "dutiful" out of the last 20 years, 18I have been spent as a caregiver...
Keep questioning...the answers will appear...you're on the right path Ryan
Thank you so much April!
Older than you, I feel you, brother. You know more than you think, and your video was a step, one more foot in front of the other. Keep on keepin’ on, you're not alone. ☮️
Thank you so much my friend, I really appreciate this
ok